I finished re-reading “Till We Have Faces” By: C.S. Lewis. It has been three years since I last read it, but it still leaves me in awe. C.S. Lewis has a way of helping me through my struggles against God, and to fall deeper in love with Him.
After Orual (the main character) has a chance to state her complaints against the gods, she reflects on the experience by saying:
“I saw well why the gods do not speak openly, nor let us answer. Till that word can be dug out of us, why should they hear the babble that we think we mean? How can they meet us face to face till we have faces?”
After Orual’s meeting with the gods, she is utterly transformed. At the end of her life, she writes in the last paragraph of her book:
“I know now, Lord, why you utter no answer. You are yourself the answer. Before your face questions die away. What other answer would suffice?”
I have often struggled in my faith due to philosophical and theological contradictions between my heart, mind, and life experiences. Sometimes, I have teetered on the edges of relativism. But as I pursued God (or as He pursued me), many of my questions lost their meaning. As I spent time, and as I spend time with The Christ, I begin to realize how much of my struggles were only babble based in illusion. These illusions fall away as I dwell in front of the face of Christ.
I have been practicing Lectio Divina in the Gospel of John, and I find myself afterwards, feeling like I have just sat at the feet of Christ, as if I was actually with the historical Jesus. And the truth is, I was. C.S. Lewis’ words are so true…”before your face, all questions die away.” The only point in all of life is Christ. It is when I stray from this understanding that I find myself babbling like an ignorant child again.
I guess my point and hope is that those who are plagued by theological, philosophical, and experiential struggles – struggles that keep them from seeking out God – would just take a moment to set them aside, and get to know the Christ. If you seek to grasp or own some truth, you will be disappointed, because the truth is not something one can own, the truth is a Person.
Let us look into the face of Christ, that we may find our true faces.